Cookies and Kitties
by Zondaria
Summary: Cookies for the holiday season. Hee hee hee.


I was going to wait until next month to post this story but since me access to the internet is limited at times, I thought the sooner I get this out the better. The inspiration for this fic came to me while at my mother's house. My brother was baking cookies and their cat jumped up into the christmas tree and knocked it over. So was born the idea for this story. A year ago. Procrastination is my middle name.

I warn you now, Roy and Ed are OOC. Extremely. But then again, people can get rather sentimental around the holiday season. I think I got Al down though. I am introducing a muse. Meet Artemis.

Artemis: Hi everybody.

Hey, be a dear and do the disclaimer for me.

Artemis: Nothing is owned. Never has been. Never will be.

Thank you.

Artemis: Can we turn up the heat in here? I'm freezing!

Well, with the rising cost of gas, natural gas that is, we can't afford for it to be too high.

Artemis: Just a little?

No. Now quit whining and go find a blanket or something. These nice readers want to get to the story.

Cookies and Kitties

"Edward!"

"Yes?"

"Will you come here please?"

Ed stopped in his tracks when he heard the colonel say please. Something was up.

The chibi decided he'd rather be safe than sorry and thus stepped into the kitchen with caution.

It was empty.

"Roy?" Ed called uncertainly.

No one answered so he took another step and called louder, "Roy, where are you?"

Again no response. By now Edward was quite irritated and stormed out into the middle of the room yelling, "Roy Mustang, where the hell did you go?"

The blonde squeaked when he felt someone embrace him from behind.

"Edward."

Ed blinked. Did Roy just whine?

This was not going to end well.

"What?"

Roy, who had his face nuzzled into Ed's neck, whispered something the blonde didn't quiet catch.

"What was that?"

Roy lifted his head and repeated, "I want cookies."

"C-cookies?" Ed stammered. This wasn't like Roy Mustang at all. "Why do you want cookies?"

"Why else? Because it's snowing."

Had the mighty Flame Alchemist finally gone insane?

"What does snow have to do with cookies?"

"It means the holidays are coming." Roy explained.

"You want christmas cookies." Edward said knowingly.

"Uh-hu."

Ed blinked. "But christmas isn't until next month."

"I want to get an early start."

"I never pegged you as a "christmasy" type of guy, Roy."

"I'm not. But I respect others beliefs even if they don't agree with mine."

Ed was shocked. Under normal circumstances, Roy would never admit something like that out loud. It could just be the fact that the temperature was dropping.

Seeing as Roy was the 'Flame' Alchemist, and wasn't used to the cold, maybe his brain was freezing over. Coated by a thin layer of sentimentality. Roy Mustang, sentimentality. In the same sentence? This was getting scary.

"Roy?" Edward asked.

The grunt that answered told him the colonel was listening.

"Seriously, why do you want cookies?"

"It's just…" Ed could feel Roy's reluctance to answer. The taisa sighed, "My mother used to make cookies every week leading up to christmas, so it's just something that's special to me."

Ed suddenly realized how very personal this was for his love to admit.

Roy hardly ever spoke of his family or his childhood. So for Roy to just spontaneously begin talking about his mother was enough to send Edward for a loop.

"You know, Al and I used to make christmas cookies with 'our' mother too." Ed whispered, attempting to make Roy feel better.

"So you understand how I feel."

Ed turned in his lover's arms and embraced Roy tightly.

"Love you."

Roy blinked, "Getting mushy on me, huh? That's not like the great Fullmetal Alchemist."

Ed raised his head and glared, " I can be mushy if I want to, got it?"

"Yes, sir." Roy dropped his voice, "And I love you, too."

Edward's cheeks tinted lightly because it wasn't everyday Roy said those words. The cold must 'really' be affecting him.

"So," Ed began softly, "What kind of cookies did you have in mind?"

"Ones with red-orange icing like fire."

"Should've known." Ed mumbled.

"And the cookies have to be cut in the shape of flames."

"Were you fascinated with fire even when you were a toddler?"

"Of course. I used to always draw alchemy circles and make little fires. A few times I set fire to the trees in the backyard."

"Did you ever come close to burning your house down?" Ed asked with mild interest.

"Once a week if I remember correctly."

"You are such a pyromaniac." Ed groaned.

"But you love me that way, yes?" Roy asked.

"Of course." A pause, "But we've gotten off the subject."

"Yes, we have." Roy confirmed, nodding. "So, shall we make cookies together?"

The blonde hugged him again, "Nothing would make me happier."

"Well then, why don't you go ahead and get the baking stuff out? I'll be right back."

"Okay." Edward said uncertainly.

Once, Ed turned his back, Roy silently slipped from the kitchen and made a beeline for his home office, closing the door behind him. He picked up the receiver of the telephone on the desk and dialed a familiar number.

"Brother!"

"Al? What are you doing here?"

"The colonel-" Al started.

Roy glared at him. They had just talked about this whole name issue over the phone.

"I mean, Roy-" Al corrected.

The Flame gave a little nod.

"-called me and asked if I would come over to make cookies with the two of you." Al had been totally shocked when he realized who was on the other end of the phone line but even more surprised by what Roy had said to him. The colonel asked if Alphonse would please come to his house to assist both himself and Edward with the task of baking cookies."

"He did?" Ed looked past his brother and stared at Roy, "Is that where you disappeared to?"

"That's right. I told Al to get here as fast as he could so we wouldn't get very far without him."

Edward stared for a second more before he bounded over to latch onto the colonel's neck, squealing, "You're so sweet to me!"

Alphonse blinked, "Should I come back later? When you're done?"

Ed glared, walked over to a box in the corner that Roy hadn't noticed until now, and pulled something out. He sat it on the floor and waited for a reaction. He wasn't disappointed.

"KITTY!" Al shrieked happily.

The kitten jumped at the sudden noise and streaked off into the confines of the house with Al close behind calling, "Kitty!"

Ed laughed softly but Roy scowled, "Why was that cat in my house without my knowledge?" he demanded.

Ed looked at him sheepishly, "It just kind of wandered in about an hour ago."

Roy blinked. "Do you really expect me to believe that?"

"It doesn't matter if you believe it or not, it's the truth. I just didn't put the kitten back outside."

Roy sweatdropped. "Edward, you're impossible."

Ed beamed, "I know." His face took on a sudden thoughtful expression, "And besides, that kitten reminded me of Al."

"How so?"

The blonde didn't respond right away and in the brief silence the two state alchemists heard the younger Elric racing through the living room calling, "Here kitty, kitty!"

"Just the way it looked at me. Its eyes seemed so much like his that I couldn't resist its cuteness."

Another long pause was broken by Roy asking loudly, "So, are we going to make cookies some time this year?"

"We can't, not without Al."

"Well then…why don't we do something more…entertaining in the meantime?" Roy purred.

Ed felt a chill race up his spine. Roy only used 'that' tone of voice when…they were about to…

"I don't think that would be a good idea."

"Why not?" By now, Roy had stepped up behind the blonde and pulled the chibi into his arms.

"Because my brother is here." Edward ended on a soft moan as the colonel's lips nipped at his neck.

"Then let's go upstairs…I think Al's pretty occupied with that cat."

It was true. The younger Elric hadn't stopped his dash for the kitten and was 'still' calling, "Kitty, kitty, kitty!" Obviously completely oblivious to the fact that there were two other people in the house.

"We should at least tell him we're going upstairs." Edward said.

"Let's leave him a note."

"A note?" Ed repeated. "And what, pray tell, should it say? 'Al we've gone upstairs for about an hour, make yourself comfortable with the kitten and please wait for us'?"

"What's wrong with that?"

Roy gave his chibi such a seductive look that Ed couldn't argue the point anymore. So the note was scribbled hastily and left on the kitchen table under a kitten shaped cookie jar that Alphonse had bought Ed for his birthday. That way Al would be sure to find it, seeing as how he always manage to spot anything in the form of a cat. Their task done, the two stated alchemists rushed to their bedroom quietly so as not to disturb Al who had finally caught the evasive little kitty and was stroking it, while the cat itself was struggling to escape Al's death grip.

"Brother?" Al called.

He had given up with the kitten and went searching for his brother and the colonel.

"Edward?"

No answer.

He ventured into the kitchen and spied the note on the table. Picking it up, he recognized Roy's semi-neat handwriting.

'Alphonse, since you're busy with your new "playmate", your brother and I decided to entertain ourselves. Please make yourself at home in the meantime.'

Translation:

'I'm going to go screw your brother for a while. Please, get comfy until we're done.'

Al sighed deeply, "Well, I guess I'll have to wait for those cookies."

From the second level of the house he could hear a distant scraping accompanied by muffled moans that could only be coming from the mouth of Edward Elric.

Al sighed again, "I'll have to wait a 'long' time for those cookies."

OWARI

What do you think? Personally, I like this story. I'm proud of it!  And did Al scare anybody? Please tell me. I can totally see a giant suit of armor chasing a cat.

And, if you're wondering, the aforementioned "distant scraping" was the sound of a bed on hard wood floor. Tell me you get it. Please?

Until the next fluff…

IN YOUR EYE!


End file.
